Wow, look how fast the time has gone. That was pretty quick though. I guess I never realized how a year has already gone by. Well, a lot has happened since a year ago. I changed a lot, I experienced a lot, I grew a lot (except in the height department). I dunno how I'm supposed to list down everything that has changed in me though, so I guess I'll just go for the main bits.
A year ago, as you can see in the picture, I was still really happy. I didn't worry about being alone, I didn't have trust issues, I was alright. I'm not blaming anyone for the change that happened though, except maybe myself. I mean, it is kinda my fault that I changed like this. Now, I would cry almost every night. I would keep a box full of memories near me and I would read the little notes that someone made for me before so I wouldn't feel so alone. I have tons of stuffed toys to hug and keep me company during the night now. Deep down, I became scared of what would happen to me. Yeah, I guess this change is not for the good. My attitude totally changed around people. I would get mad easily, I would start swearing whenever I could (which is something I never did a year ago), and I wouldn't be able to control my emotions. Hmm. As I'm typing this, I realize that my life sucks. :/
Well of course, not everything that changed about me is bad. I mean, I've also changed for the better. Back then, I was a selfish brat that only thought of myself. Now, I guess you can take the brat part out. I'm still selfish, but not as bad as before. I prioritize others before myself now. I've also become more responsible. I joined a bunch of extra curricular activities to help me pass the time, like Mathematics Circle and the College Government of Science. I also have a lot more new friends now. I'm more approachable now than before. Sometimes, I even make the first move to make a new friend, which is something I rarely did before. I guess you can say that I have become a lot busier now. And that's not necessarily a bad thing. It helps keep my mind off of things.
I guess the biggest change though is how I have grown beside God. I remember back in high school when I would never go to church unless there's a required mass in school. But now, I regularly attend a youth service on Fridays and small groups on Tuesdays. Yeah, I know I still have a long way to go, and I know that I still do a lot of wrong that no one would be proud of, but at least now I can say that I'm trying to get back to God. I'm at least making an effort to change for the better. I want to be able to share to others that I am following God's will. I want to make God proud to have a daughter like me. I know that this might take a while, but I'm still willing to go on, even if it's just one step at a time.
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